The Nawabi Guest

Northern India is a delight and pain in Arse simultaneously. We got off at Nukhlow(yes no more shitty "Lukhnow") railway station, which was a small clean and generally pleasant station. Sapota was surprised as to why is this station so small, which later turned out to be smaller part of humongous railway station. We were to head somewhere more deeper in Uttar pradesh, but we thought of taking a break and looking at the beautiful city, so we went on. We entered this market, which look more like a familiar road side market of any Indian City. So as were marching inside, some waiter asked us in elegant politeness. It was quite enchanting, but sapota must confess, we were starving, so the effect was double.
This hotel or dhaba was in this market called as "char bagh". The waiters was all around us, treating us with high regards as if we were here on food inspection. As we sat down they turned on the desert cooler, Wow, that felt like a king. And then one of them sat around us explaining things. So this hotel was owned by some highly religious Vashya(the merchant community in hindus) and to our little dismay, they don't use onions and garlics here, but the boy explained us that food is tasty even without these essentials.
So what to order? We ordered Parwal(a member of cucurbitacea family, sapota is not sure what is it called in English) and dal makhani and phulkas(steamed-on-flame breads!). Gosh! They were mindblowingly delicious. They served pickles, salad and butter along, and the great hospitality was making this experience more memorable. They told lassi is great at this place, So we thought why not order one? Trust me or not, it was a remarkable lassi, the best I ever had. The shiv kailash lassi of pune is nothing more than sweet curd in front of this one, this was an authentic lassi, with a layer of dry fruits and a "rabdi" on the top and it was served in kullads(the earthern pots).
Man, man, this was real good treat, with no gimmicks around. And when the bill arrived, it was merely 130 bucks for all this? We were overwhelmed when one of the waiter helped us in getting an auto-rickshaw. That was a real royal treatment.
It was raining cat and dogs in Nucklow, typical north indian rain, which is quite contrasting to drizzling of Pune. We were looking around the majestic city, which was as beautiful as a clear night of summer, wide roads, elegant landmarks, serene Gomti flowing in background, it all looked like a painting. Roads were blocked with water, we were stuffed till the brim, but it was a real blast being treated like Nawab.

Shane: you are my man!!

why? or even why a post on cricket? Sapota hates cricket, wont explain why, because that will require another blog.
Sapota's point is about Shane Warne. He is my man, respect for him all the way. Reasons? Off course, not only on-the-field but also off-the-field, he is a real dude.
He is one the few Guys, who are worthy of the label "the real STUD"!!! why, because he have fucked so many women?
And silly bustard, that's what he is, has a hilarious clip where he is engaged in pillow fighting with girls. Silly? ain't he? Oh yes, but he was having fun.
Next big thing, he had phone sex, even when he was married and had two kids. They found proofs of him doing this. Others have also done this, come on don't tell me, Australians are no way polygamous people.
He was bound to be captain of Australia, but unlucky bustard was in the middle of all this shit. Australians must have smiled on him, "silly bloke, fucking women here and there!!!"

Shane Warne is Greatest spinner ever; about his performance and sportsmanship, there are no doubts and ambiguity. One man has made a team of underdog and youngsters perform and beat the shit out of all those so-called big guns and made them look like bunnies.
That day in match with Ganguly's team, Ganguly pointed at character of Shane Warne. why? who the fuck he think, he is? Ganguly is a lousy jerk, a filthy loser and fuck-all skipper. Everyone know you were after Nagma, but you are a loser man, only real man fuck women , not lousy losers like you. So better look at your self before you point fingers at this great man.

Shane has proved his ability: a single handed coach & captain, a performer himself, a shrewd strategist, a great leader, an impressive spokesperson and offcourse a lady charmer. Man, great respect for you. Sapota doesn't care if his team wins any more matches or not, but he has proved his point.

i'm so excited!!!

me: Hey! I am so excited?
me: Why?(pondering?) what is so exciting?
me: Nothing, i am just excited. I feel so.
me: what? there is a precursor to everything? there should be something.
me: (pondering)...
me: what? you are thinking, ha ha, you clueless fool, u are thinking! ROFL.
me: there aren't always reason for things.
me: u are pointless AGAIN???
me: (song: wherever i may roam, where i stay....)
me: STOP!!! you idiot, you can't listen Metallica, while talking to me.
me: you are an arrogant jerk.
me: SO????
me: you think that's kool.
me: LOL. you are trying to act smarter, you dumb looser, ha ha, you know what...
me: (aping) you know what...
me: (frowned)
me: every dog has a day.
me: you mean a dog-day afternoon?
me: yuck!!! that was a real bad one.
me: oh really!!! you think u are Jim carrey?
me: there is a minimum specified level.
me: where? ISO 840 and 420?
me: (twisting my mouth!!!)that was quite mature of you.
me: oh yeah, I know that, as always(hissing...).
me: hey man the excitement is gone.
me: oh again! back? - yeah......... May be then I will fade away
and don't have to face the fact.....SSSSSSSSSSSS.....

Kill for Something.

Sapota is going to write a post on voilence again, previous post was more on line of being gory and brutal. But a massacre is that way, nothing can change that. What follows next is another story of blood being spilled. Sapota is not going to present any justification on any action or views, but will present it in a way perceived by someone who has actually undergone all this. There is no disclaimer on it being true or views being biased or if they controversial content, one is free to derive any understanding of this story:

They say there is something about the water of chambal, which brings a kind of unrest, a tendency to fight. The river is vital to survival of residents of this place. In this peaceful night of summer after a day of scorching heat, burning anything that is exposed, the last thing I expect is a fight, but this place was never in peace.
There is a distant voice, "Suren bhaiya, are you coming to the fields?"
I was lost somewhere but that voice brought the mundane life back to me, I shout back "YES, I am coming".
"Bhaiya this year we will hardly have any harvest, this is july end and a not a single cloud in the firmament",
I was still lost "u'm, oh yes, bad season I guess".
"Do you know rinku will be back in village?"
I thought "why?, what does he want", but i never spoke back.
"I think that's rumor, those pichola(sub faction in village) folks are spreading".
"really? what will they get out of it?"
He became little thoughtful now, "he killed 5 of their folks, they are looking for revenge"
"I know that. but what good will the rumor do?"
"This will give them an excuse to come to this part with their weapons loaded and put some show here frightening people"
The great warrior clan of this motherland has belonged to the kings. The last thing a Rajput will do is swallow his pride. We want to live with dignity and respect, and if something prevents that, I wont deter to eliminate it. Rinku is a by-product of this glory. Rajput were known for their valor, glory, bravery and relenteless love with the motherland. The list of virtues was still bigger, but it has shrunk and there are very few left with really some of them. Nothing comes without side effects, If I am brave then I am angry and if I am justice-loving, I will fight for it and this fight will not be peaceful. It is always the war that comes to my mind when it comes to love of justice and love of this motherland.
I boomed back to life "Rinku is a kalank(contextual meaning:disgrace, literally:stain) to this entire Rajput community."
he knew my blood was boiling.
"but bhiya, he is our kid"
"Do hell with such kid, his father has protected all his deeds, till he became this monster, I would have killed such a son a long time back"
"bhaiya its not that simple!"
he was right, killing your son is last thing one can think of, but atleast I could have stopped him from becoming a monster. but who knows? the love for one's progeny blinds the parent.
"Jagan is back home for vacations" he said changing the topic.
"oh really. first thing in morning will be meeting him"
Fields were now visible.
"what is all this police doing near tube-well?"
he had a quick answer "must be drinking, what other business do they have here"
me "u'm"


"Surendra!!! wake up" she shouted.
I wake up in half haste and half sleep.
"what the time?"
"leave the time aside, their is some problem in the village"
I sprang back to life immediately, without a second thought I thought that Rinku bustard must have came back and done something.
she said "sarpanch(village head) has called u immediately to chaupal(gathering place in a village)"
I said lazily, "right now?"
"yes! rush to chaupal"
There was a huge gathering, almost all men of village were there. I was surprised to see so many folk at such an odd hour.
They all were looking at me as if something sinister is going on around.
Avtar Singh, the village sarpanch directly to me, "Son, this is time to take out your gun"
A sudden chill, a feel of death, a resistance was surmounting. I don't want to fight, No one actually want to. But Avtar singh is a man of his words, he wont say any non-sense.
"But what is the matter kaka?"
"They killed Jagan" with a firm voice. Everyone except him had watery eyes. Man of his stature don't cry, they have seen it all.
Me without a thought, "I will kill all pichola bustards", my voice became hoarse as if I was shouting at peak of my voice.
Bheem singh, "Its police!"
I was taken aghast "Why would police kill an Army Soldier???"
Bheem singh came forward with his arms around my shoulders, "they took him for Rinku"
I was admant, "Pichola folks must has conspired againt us with police"
Bheem singh, "Police was tracing rinky down right from Kanpur(a North Indian City), their informers have mistaken Jagan for Rinku"
Rinku although a notorious criminal now, was hardly 22 years old and last month he killed Kanpur's top don in the daylight in a crowded market. He had all shades of bravery, courage like a typical Rajput, but he had a criminal mind. Those instinct of fighting is turning this great community into a pit of producing criminals. Since Rinku's rise, half of young boys of this community have joined him. The reasons were simpler, "quick fame", "easy money" and yes! this is an era of unemployment and kids are hardly into proper eduction.
I asked "Now what?"
Someone "We will hunt down the thana(police station)"
"Are you out of your mind, we wont kill police"
Avtar Singh, "Yes, we will."
Gopal came forward sobbing, "Suren, they have killed my Ram-like(Ideal) son, We were about to fix his marriage next week!!!"
My blood started boiling, one side I could imagine a filthy criminal Rinku and on the other a simple ideal son Jagan, who was first cousin of Rinku. There is nothing more grave than seeing blood of your own child. And Jagan was one such child of this village, everyone loved him like their own son and he was just 23. All I could see now was blood, it was instinctive. I am growing old, but can still chase and hunt these government dogs.
"kaka, how many men are coming with me?" even if there was no one, I would do it all alone.
"Seven. there are around 10 policemen in chowki right now ,including daroga(sub-inspector). I know you can hunt them down easily"
At these moments, there are no exceptions, "Yes, we will, when should we start?"
"Now, once police realizes what they have done, they will expect the retaliation and they will be well prepared and we wont be able to take this revenge"
"I am going to bring my gun, everyone meet me near tubewell"
I am the de facto leader for this mission, this is the kind of responsibility, I knew I have to shoulder sometimes in my life. And I am not supposed to come home defeated. My father, whom I considered an Idealist to the core, always had a saying "don't come home beaten" and I never had.
I took my gun out from the trunk, which was rusting for a long time. My wife took the gun from me and started cleaning the barrels. There was no conversation, she was prepared for this. She is a true Rajput lady, who was born with guns firing around, she had been drawing inspiration from likes of Rani Padamavati(A queen, who gave her life for glory).

"Today we will make this place a chhavni(Contextually: Battle field, literally: Cantonment)" Jagan's Elder Cousin Prakash said forcefully.
These seven men now were blood thirsty, the only skill left in them is killing. By all means they will achieve what they want.
We started marching towards chowki, there was no plan, just plain anger. No one was speaking, only sound was thumping of our feet against the village dust. I was getting eager, this small walking time was making me more anxious and impatient.
We went straight inside the chowki. Chandan fired the first shot directly aiming the groin of the first policemen, he saw. There were 4 more shots fired from 4 different barrels and killing 3 more policemen. They couldn't even react to what was happening.The battle has begun and it was 7 vs 6 now. Daroga who was sitting in the other room realized something, I can't say what, but as soon as Omi entered the next room he was shot on left side of his abdomen with the pistol. We all step back and they fired three more bullets on Omi, he was dead. Avdhesh rushed in the next room while firing blindfolded, hitting one policeman in arm. Daroga and one policemen had already jumped from the window. We all entered room. I was furious again to see that khaki Dog and fired two bullets killing him.
"Babuloo and Prakash, stay here and we will signal you when we reach near window, rest come with me towards the main door", I said while waving my hand in the direction of next room.
As soon as we returned to the previous room, I spotted three more policemen coming from main exit unaware of the situation. Within a moment or so, they all opened firing except me, killing two of them. One escaped and started running haphazardly here and there. I felt a kind of relief seeing this khaki dog running madly, I felt like an executioner just waiting to kill the dog. I aimed at him while he was running, first bullet missed him narrowly. Second bullet came from other direction, which hit me on the shoulder. They all opened fire in the other direction.
Daroga and other policemen were firing from the other direction, this time they were well prepared and standing behind a tree. But fortune was on our side, Babuloo managed to jump out of window of next room and took a position just behind daroga, he killed Daroga instantly. he was in open field, so the other policeman shot him down easily.
They all again opened fire towards the tree, but no one was successful. Prakash rejoined us near the main gate. When he saw me wounded,he reaction was impulsive like a stubborn kid and he started running madly towards the tree and with lighting speed he hit the policeman with gun in the forehead, who was on the ground next second. And then he kept hitting him furiously again and again till he was all in blood. Someone killed him with the gun, relieving him from this torture.
The other policeman escaped. He was only survivor from this side. We have lost two of our men.

I was lying wounded in my bed wounded while 4 of my men has fled from the village. RAF was deployed in the village. I knew they will come for me very soon. I wont flee, there is still one left to be killed.
It happened much earlier than I expected. That khakhi dog came to get me with RAF man. My gun was lying on other side of the bed. They were proceeding towards me with loaded gun, within a minute or so the policeman uttered something, which I never bothered to hear. Somehow I managed to sit and next moment, I took the gun and shot him somewhere on throat. Next I could remember is blazing of guns and death coming, but my mission was accomplished.

No running with torch this time.

Sapota knows what you guys are thinking? See this is not about exploiting my stature. But this is about a bigger cause.
Sapota has decided this time not to run with olympic torch in order to support the Tibetan cause. Sapota knows that he should not mix politics with sports, but its not about sport any more, this is more about humanity. Sapota is an advocate of democracy, liberty and freedom, but these communist bustards have crushed a free democratic country for its political and military motives.
Sapota watched some hindi movie(yes friends, yet again) and there was so much of cliche, repeated dailogues and over-exploitation of themes like patriotism and emotions. Sapota is tired of bashing hindi movies. Sapota sound so much beating about the SAME bloody bush again and again. Commercialization has touched everything, but still there is a way of making good movies, with commercial value. Yet still these communist bustards are torturing peaceful protesters.
If Marx would have been alive and seeing what people has done with his peaceful theory of social development, he would have burnt Das Kapital with his own hands. Sapota wont advocate communism, but in spirit after imperialism and despotic reign, it was the best thing, which talk about a total social development. But these guys have twisted it as totalitarian regime. Nevertheless, nothing less is hindi movies doing, they are torturing people in name of entertainment. Each movie tries to show everything in a single go and none of them is shown well.
Phew, life is stuck with head in ass, national newpaper is a tabloid, national movies are big fucks and my friends in Tibet are suffering.

My First Rolling Stone

Sapota after watching this movie "almost famous" was very much impressed by Rolling Stone, the magazine. Now again after watching this flick school of rock, Sapota could relate rock and roll to his life more closely. Sapota was listening to rock and roll for a long time now, but the pleasure to discover more was becoming a passion. So Sapota started hunting around for posters, he could just manage one of "Nirvana", Sapota was desperate to get 'Metallica" poster at any cost. So Sapota started looking for magazines which publish poster, but to his dismay, in Pune there was only RSJ. So this hunt for poster ended in Sapota looking for magazines on rock and roll; as you become religious u start referring to fundamentals, so sapota started looking for Rolling Stone, but it was no where in Pune. So I looked around at internet, there were so many of them available but shipping charges from US were deterring. Then someone went to US, so Sapota asked him to get 1000th edition of Rolling stones, but again disappointment. Then again Sapota read 50 great stories in Rolling Stones, where Bono writes about Beatles and Marilyn manson wrote about The 'Holy' Doors, Sapota was bloody hooked, he desperately wanted the Magazine. Sapota once went to Bangalore, so here in Landmark Stores they had a "ROLLING STONE"!!!, Sapota was thrilled, but that edition had Jack Nicholson on cover and price was 500 bucks, Sapota thought not worth it, he wanted to buy, but like typical India consumer was justifying "if this would have been 1000th edition I would have paid 1000 buck, but for Nicholson, no way". Although Sapota likes Nicholson but this is the not the right place.
So when Sapota again went to Bangalore, he saw a street boy having a rolling stone in his hand, he said "what?", then he realized that its Rolling Stone India for just 100 bucks; there were no second thought, within seconds "give me the mag, here is your 100 bucks" Sapota was thrilled, he had his first Rolling stones in his hand. Sapota didn't like the cover a bit since it was some hip hop star. But inside they have Led Zeppelin and the holy God of Guitar Jimi Hendrix. Sapota is happy that they started it here in India and want to thanks them from bottom of his heart. Sapota's target to get 1000th edition and 50 great stories is still on list, but for now contended with his new prized possession.
long live rolling stone (\m/ *respect).

The man who saw Mustaine live...

Yeah, I am the man, Fuck yeah, I have seen Mustaine live.... and yes I will bloody brag about it for decades. And one more confession to make I love Bangalore crowd, the fucking awesome crowd, this the best gig till date.
Ladies and gentleman, I went to Bengluru to witness one of the biggest rock festival in country know as "Rock in India", where 9 bands played live viz. Prestorika, Casino Blues, Junkyard Groove, Motherjane, Thermal and a quartet, Millennium, Pentagram, Machine Head, MEGADETH. By the time I reached Palace Grounds, It was around 17:20 hrs, so many of these small bands have already performed. I was looking at arrangement and it was fabulous, there were stalls of booze and cold drink and fast food and official rock merchandise all inside the precinct of concert grounds. One more exciting thing was bungee jumping equipment all inside the grounds, and many guys and gals were trying it. As I went inside, I saw the same large stage where my lords Maiden played Last year and hey! there was another stage on my right hand side. This stage was smaller and by the time I reached this band "Thermal" was performing, I didn't bother to hear them. I was looking around for a place to sit, yup! I want to conserve my energy.
So again the typical environment, which so much is a culture and for few its a religion, all forms of hip dresses and drooling beauties with fags in their hands. So I kept sitting at the end of the concert grounds while "Thermal" finished. Next came this Bangalorean band called "Millennium", this band has been performing since last two decades and the lead vocalist of the band was Fucking awesome. Their sound is quite heavily metallic and the vocalist and drummer were really good. I enjoyed the band, although I was clueless about the music. Then came this shit head band called Pentagram, the filthy Son of Bitch, Vishal Dadlani came on stage, and these guys were singing something disco remix of some bollywood shit, I didn't even bother to listen. I wanted to shout loudly "Fuck you Motherfucker Vishal, you dared insulted my Lords Maidens, you die after while your dick is being chopped off", but I resisted the temptation and just showed him my finger to say "you suck".
Now entire focus shifted on Main stage, where this band called Machine head appeared, this band is a thrash metal band. The vocalist was quite an impressive front man, he has loud screeching vocals apt for his band. Other band members were quite impressive, a truly international band. To my surprise the crowd here knew the vocals for machine head and there was this head banging, which soon converted into a Mosh pit. I shifted my location in oder to avoid being ran down in the mosh pit. The lead vocalist said, "when I came here they ask what will you get in India, but I tell you folks, Bangalore is fucking awesome", "I love you Banglore". He was mad at the crowd response. I am sorry folks, I have no clue what all did they play, It was first time I ever heard them, the music was groovy, but not to my tastes, but yeah the band has it.
Now the banner of machine head was taken down and there was huge Megadeth banner on the back of stage. So everyone was getting impatient, when they started playing some number from Ozzy and Pantera etc. There were bunch of guys and gals making the dope, just next to me.
Finally as stage went dark and the drummer Shawn drover started the thumping and then i saw James Lomenzo, the bassist and then Chris Broderick, the new lead guitarist kicking the lead and then Finally I saw, His Holy Lord "The DAVE MUSTAINE". Oh My holy Devil, this was the moment crowd was waiting for, there was an uproar, hands in air with devil horns floating in air. They played three songs one after another without a break, crowd gasped as to what is happening. There was one guy who was standing besides me, he was headbanging and jumping very enthusiastically, then this guy suddenly asked me "Dude, Can you believe I am seeing Dave mustaine live", I was stunned, "What is with this guy?". While they played "Sleepwalker" from their new album, then they played "Take no prisoners" and then they played "Never walk alone". Then after this Mustaine came for talking, he was brief he said "We will do the talking on our website, here we will just play". And then came "Hanger 18", Oh Devil, the dude besides me went mad. I thought that he was just another kid on high, but then I realized he is one of true devotees , he was madly holding his head with his hands and shouting "kill us Mustaine" and then again he asked me "dude, do you believe I am seeing mustiane live". I had no answer, For a moment I wanted to be him. The kind of Fan Following Megadeth has is awe-inspiring, he bloody knew all the bloody lyrics.
Then again they played "trust" and "skin of my teeth", Fuck man Dave does it so fucking well. There was a crowd uproar singing the lyrics. The song finished with killer lead by Chris. Then next came "toute le mode", Now was the turn to pay real homage to the gods, the crowd was singing in unison, every bloody one was knowing the lyrics, Love you Bangalore crowd for the respect shown to the lords. Next Came "Tornado of Soul", Fuck man!, the real Live "Tornado", Fuck!, Fuck!! Fuck!!!. Mustaine took the lead so fucking flawlessly, I went mad with my head banging with each riff and and each beat, as if time has just stopped.
"what do you mean I don't believe in god?....." Oh man here came the lead .... I must say Dave mustaine is my man he has resurrected the entire band from the ashes...... there came the killer solo by Chris, he is good, I wont compare him with Marty, but he does his job pretty well. So "Pe....aceeeee.... Peace sells but who's buying", I sang every line along with the crowd. Then Dave started talking he says we will come again and we love you all and things like that. This time the climate of Bangalore was awesome, clouds all over and little drizzling and wind blowing, I prayed to god for no rains. I believe Dave has an idea its going to rain, so they played lesser number of tracks than expected.
Next came "The symphony of destruction" the dude besides me again looked at me and pointed his hand in amazement. One more killer track with utmost precision, although the acoustics of the place sucked, but band didn't made people realized that. Then the band went inside and crowd was shouting for "she wolf" and "holy wars", I told one dude, they are not going to play "she wolf". After the encore, they came back and this time they played the song from new album "Washington is next", which is quite speed-metal stuff and I loved it very much. Now came the time, every Mustaine fan will kill for, "The Holy wars", Oh man I was totally mesmerized with the way they played it. What a band man. There are very few musicians who can match the capabilities of Dave Mustaine. I must say there is good reason, why all genuine metal fans respect Megadeth Most. We were waiting as if something else will come, but Dave threw some plectrums and his wrist band and drum sticks towards crowd. I wont say he is much of showman, but his music does all the talking for him. Dave you are my Man. (\m/ *respect)

Discourses on Laws of everything

As usual Lord Sapota and Venkster, the second last devil were making conversation and they landed up in defining basic laws and where does all theory comes from? So here is the conversation between Monsieur Sapota and Venkster, the second last devil.

Venkster, the devil: Yes, but one can always hypothesize.

Monsieur Sapota: i shun from such practice, there is no practical importance of such theoretical formulation. I believe either we should know or we must think that it is an unknown fact or may be it can be proved by some possible method with a interpolation of existing fact, either way it is either known or proved.

Venkster, the devil:But all proof begins with a hypothesis doesnt it..

Monsieur Sapota:well they do, but those are in form of postulates and then some mathematical or theological or some other form of proof or atleast a draft of proof is attached to them.

Venkster, the devil: Sir every form of proof comes from atleast one base hypothesis that cant be proved but is just assumed to be true...even mathematics, for example it is very easy to prove that 2+2 is not always 4, even though we know mathematically for it to be true...

Monsieur Sapota: see all things are proved with respect to some elementary results.
for example summation of integers ought to be an integer, now that is an adopted convention and proved by many real world situation. now once basic abstract form is proved, you move over to new forms. People say maths use some assumptions, but those assumptions are real world scenarios, for example in case of whole numbers, if you add two shirts to two more existing shirt in ur wardrobe, they ought to be four shirt and that is one elementary result and all equations afterwards will assume this one and prove newer entities by building blocks of existing theorems.

Venkster, the devil:Exactly my point sir, but by breaking the scenario, you can break these elementary results...like I said, I can prove two plus two is not four...

Monsieur Sapota:I am not denying that, but that proof has to be satisfied with at least 3-4 method and should justify world scenario, all advance theorems represent some or other real life scenario and then they are proved using many concurrent methodologies, proving things which are absurd is also possible, but that cannot be done with existing mathematical practices. For example, if i write a new theorem on laws of motion, I must obey Laws of Netwon, i must satisfy many quantization of my results. or if i say my new law does not obey Newtonain, then i must prove that newtonian results are wrong in these sets of circumstances. And trust me if you are challenging a law existing from centuries, you better have a proof right from the basic building element, otherwise ur result is wrong.

Venkster, the devil:Nahin sir thats where you are wrong, all "proofs" of yours are built upon certain basic laws in which we believe the world to behave, but none of these laws have been proved, and hence we can always create new basic laws that run outside this world to disprove anything...

Monsieur Sapota: dood, all basic laws are proved.
Pythagorean, newtonian, la placian, de moiviers or Einstenien, all laws are proved.
there are no basic laws which don't have proofs.
Why do u think calculus or vectors were invented or for that matter all those advance transforms were derived?
if new laws are invented they are first held until they are mathematically or in some way proved. No law is approved without a proper proof and i have not seen any exception to that.

Venkster, the devil:Nahin sir all basic laws are only proved at the macro level, everything breaks down at the micro or super macro level and you know that...

Monsieur Sapota:micro level? why would i prove some laws at level where there is no requirement for them. Newtonian laws are no good at quantum level? and quantum laws are no good at macroscopic level. There is an objectivity associated with each science and the scope of proof is limited in that sphere. As i early said all basic laws are proved from practical understanding and everything else is based on those basic blocks.

Venkster, the devil:Sir but even those basic laws break down under different conditions, which brings me back to my first point, that some basic hypothesis has to be made (which cannot be proven), for example, most basic laws are based on the theory of space and time, but both of these break down at the super-macro level...

Monsieur Sapota:all laws are provided to be true under set of circumstances, even the velocity of light changes, but under severely different set of governing factors and is rarely observed(~10 raised to some mind boggling small number). All laws of time and space are not absolute, you can make hypothesis, but what are the ground works for it. I mean you just go randomly and make your hypothesis and then say i will find a proof and my proof will contain new hypothesis designed by me only? no i don't think that works fine for me. All law are primitives of some other law and the smallest of the laws are proved by observations and results and practical applications.

Venkster, the devil:Nahin sir thats what I've been trying to tell you...all laws are primitives of some other laws and the smallest of laws are something that have been assumed to be true...

Monsieur Sapota: okay, lets say for example that all basic laws are assumptive. where are those assumptions derived from?

Venkster, the devil: From some things that just cannot be proved...for example the basest of basest, gravity...

Monsieur Sapota:but gravity is not a hypothesis its a fact, and if you don't remember there has been thousands of experiment to prove its constants value and the the laws governing gravity i.e. Universal law of Gravitation has been proved by Newton in mathematical terms and results are tallied with respect to actual values.

Venkster, the devil: Sir it has been proved only through experiments, there is no effective theory as to why it exists...

Monsieur Sapota:yeah, there is no theory of its existence, but its not hypothesis either. As far as i know huge work on existence of gravitation has been done, but no concrete findings have been made. in fact all major scientist of applied mechanics and classical mechanics has devoted substantial time to the existence of gravity.

Venkster, the devil: So then since no concrete findings have been made, it still is not proof is it, but there are a million and one formulae based on gravity and its essentials...sir my point is this, that any proof works only within a given environment, it fails outside of that, therefore nothing is absolute...

Monsieur Sapota:i am not making claims to absolutism either. The reason is not found, but its existence is verified. And formulas are used for application and not for the cause. Finding reason for something is quite different from stating it exist. For example to find gravitational force between two objects a formula is derived, now the value of constant is calibrated with experiments. gravity may or may not be absolute, but exception to the newtonian gravity laws in STATIC mode is not known (atleast not until now), so in static scenario its absolute, but for dynamic it behaves differently, so all laws are subject to certain scope, where they hold true.

Venkster, the devil:So then since everything is defined only within a certain scope, is it not possible to find a scope where there may be no definition?

Monsieur Sapota:scope without definition: hmmm, that's interesting. may be some time space theory of some distant stars or blackholes or may be quasars have such set of parameters, but here on earth(since all laws are formulated here), scope is so well defined.

Venkster, the devil: You'll be surprised sir but even on earth there are conditions that have yet to be defined...for example at the deepest points of the ocean...

Monsieur Sapota: at deepest point in ocean Gravity holds true? what else does not hold true there?

Venkster, the devil: Not about gravity, was just giving you an example of places where things might not be the same as in the real world...

Monsieur Sapota:yaar, time-space law bends at places which can bend light, at sea bottoms that does not happen. The scope is not just about geographical parameter, but they varies with directions and set of parameters like heat, light and many such things. Now the real world scenario is: for a calculation of 10 raised to 10, 10 raised to -10 is minuscule and ignoring it is apt for all practical purpose, now you know that is not limitation of law, but it is limitation of masses to adhere to such complex system. Most of theories tend to make assumption in order to make calculation simpler, otherwise deriving a law to fullest is very much possible, but not feasible and fruitful for practical purpose.

Venkster, the devil:But then practicality is set by the very world we live in, so something that is practical to us may not be practical to someone under a completely different set of conditions...

Monsieur Sapota:haan, off course practicality is nothing but limiting case of theory, since theory gets derived from it. As i pointed out set of circumstances are nothing but the part of scope of theory, assumptions made, constants declared and things ignored

Venkster, the devil: Hehehe so we're agreeing that not everything can be proved completely, so some things have to be postulated??

Monsieur Sapota: we were not discussing that, we were discussing that basic laws are not just hypothesis(okay that's what i say).

Venkster, the devil:Basic laws are not just hypotheses (not hypothesis) so long as they are within a certain set of conditions, hence the statement cannot be generalized...

David Herbert Lawrence's Sons and Lovers.

Classic Literature has its own taste, it is slow, difficult to comprehend, full of emotions and some times full of verses. It has a unique elegance, a fine tuned beauty, which is smooth and matured. Plots, Problem-solution Scenario and discussion may sound stupid some times, but for the times in which they are set, they are just perfect. Sons and lovers was written too early in previous century and considered to be swan's song of D. H. Lawrence.
Book is difficult to start with, as most classics are, however once you overcome that threshold and become comfortable with authors writing style, it is not easy to put down. Reading these books is no easy for the simple reason that the author uses highly appropriate words, which are hard to find in common writing. the language is too much polished, metaphors are very well placed, there are all forms of literary beautifications, which makes book difficult to read in a go. The book require careful attention to understand and more than that appreciate the beauty of literature. D H Lawrence, unlike other classic author do not dwell much into fancy lands, he is very practical in his approach to writing, he presents very careful psychological analysis of all emotions behind all the actions. Sons and Lovers is quintessentially a love story, but with huge amount of intelligent ground work, however it is rich in its presentation of contemporary society in most lucid manner.
Relationship between lovers has been discussed in full length and in the spirit of love and emotions, without any melodramatic approach at any place. Mother and son relationship is depicted to its best, love-hate-judgment-fear-apathy-pity, all feelings are illustrated coherently. Love making and finer details of life are sketched precisely, never ever in the book any exaggeration of a situation is encountered. Books takes a non-conservative approach of describing conversations and mental state of characters very accurately,in contrast event are discussed with lesser details, but are given sufficient space and time. Central characters are more or less simpler and author never makes any hero out of them, they are ordinary men and women, just living their life as it comes. But even all these simple characters have complex psyche and they show extreme sensitivity towards minutest of action. There is quite a level of understanding between the characters, they utter less and understand more.

This book is definitely a must read for anyone, who appreciate good literature. They have named it one of the finest of last century. The book is impressive, not full of surprises, well narrated and a classic in every sense.

Saga of an Unfortunate Night

Witnessing one over the other tragedy is no big deal, There is a common Hindi saying, "Upar wala jab deta hai tau chappar faad kar deta hai(Literally if God giveth then he giveth to the extent of tearing your roof{makes no sense in English I know})" and to add "Upar wala jab leta hai tau gand faad kar leta hai(Literally, and if God taketh then he doeth to the extent that it tears your arse apart)" And Sapota certifies that he has not seen any exception to the above two corollaries.
Sapota left the office at about 23:00 hrs in utter fatigue, because he was working since morning 9 and was repeating this since last two days. And when you know that you have to wake up early in morning, you can't take a relaxing sleep. So that was like one hard whip after another. Anyway sapota has never tried this one particular road to return back, so lets try this one. Sapota drove along the dusty shady road thinking that it was a clever shortcut, but then he realized bike is coming to halt, Sapota turned the key in reverse direction, believing that fuel knob is adjusted in wrong direction. But when inevitable is bound to happen, nothing can prevent that. Bike stopped and sapota knew this is the end.... of the fuel(what were you thinking?). Sapota tried hard to start it, but for christ sake, how will a bike start if there is no goddamn fuel in it?
This place is shady, it has a particular faction of people living in here; there is also an extremist political outfit in this place; these days Pune is no more safe; there is an unrest related to hindi-speaking residents and I have 150 Kg bike with me. Sapota cursed all the devils in the hell and started trudging the bike along with him. Sapota was silent and walking as fast as he can, he made one or two unsuccessful attempt to start the bike. He felt suspicious about anyone he met in the way, "yes this could be one, get ready". In the way some civilized old man asked about what happened, I told him about the empty tank, so he re-inquired as to how long will I walk? Sapota started pondering, "home is too far, I just need to cross this messy place and get till cantonment and i will be safe enough". So the walk continued, sapota believed that this will be longest walk of his life, but the bloody phone rang. Sapota picked the phone, since ring tone is loud enough to attract all undue attention, but sapota cut the phone short to avoid speaking much in hindi(my folks don't settle for English). Phew... finally the cantonment, Sapota loves cantonment, it is nostalgic to see them.
Now a historic attempt of trying to extract the last drop of gasoline by tilting the vehicle horizontal, and yes it started, hurrah!!! but this is an unfortunate day, it just drove me out of Cantt, but this place was nearer to civilization and part of busy Highway, So Sapota was relieved as if this is Mt K2. Now what? make a call dude, So did I, "Get me some petrol, I am near Sappers crossing".
This is 00:00 hrs at night and the temperature is less than 15 Celsius and sapota is perspiring heavily. Sapota knew this is going to take them a loads of time to extract petrol out of their bikes and get here, so sapota started to use the greatest invention of last century to his benefits and started making random calls to pass the time. Even after calling all nocturnal animals on the planet entire time couldn't be killed. Every vehicle passing by was glancing at sapota as if he will just throw hand grenades towards the vehicle. Finally the petrol came, Sapota was cursing the bike for its fuel inefficiency and his miscalculation and this time sapota thought he will make clever resolve of not depending on his fuel calculations any more.

Sloth and Gluttony

Why is sleeping or Eating a sin? Sapota believes that eating is the next best thing since sleeping. Nothing could be as invigorating as a nice sleep and delicious food. The very reason one is alive is to eat and if you don't sleep after a nice meal, you will get sick. So, for the very fundamental reason Sleeping is the best hobby, time pass and a great exercise. They say healthy mind resides in healthy body and for that you must eat good and sleep well. What could be more entertaining and desirable than a beautiful bed. Bed is such a loyal friend, it never complains and its always there no matter how u treat it.
Can you think of a nice morning without a stomach full of tasty breakfast, no one can? All great deals are closed over dinners and all dates begin from dinner. Eating is like sex, more u do it more u like it. So the conclusion that one eat to live is like a artist without a passion for art. So one must eat n eat and sleep n sleep; Its the best thing to do, so why even bother to consider anything else.

Sapota would like to quote from Holy Lord Thin Lizzy, "Now some men like the fishin and some men like the fowlin And some men like ta hear a cannon ball a roarin, Me I like sleepin specially in my mollys chamber"........

In the last lane.....

There I go faster cutting the lanes
blood flowing faster in my veins

There comes a shadow so large
a sudden gush of anxiety in my brains.

Shall i, shall I not?
decision is hard?

What are my chances?
still, I will make my advances!

No, but do i know what is certain?
who knows what is to come?

The road is rough and ride is full of protuberances
the wind is harsh and full of turbulences

The life is stretched between now and next
why is difficult to choose the best.

sudden rush of adrenaline
a quick jerk, a smooth slow down
an intentional smooth sail
quickly popping in and out of the world and the thoughts.

coming from sides
turning left and right.
merging and streaming
navigating a sharp turning.

quickly l gain momentum and cutting past everyone.....
getting
......in the last lane.

Somewhere back in time: THE PLIGRIMAGE

I won't write this one with sapota, my alter ego is too minuscule, when you are talking something as Juggernaut as IRON MAIDENS themselves. There are times in life, when death seems bigger than life and Iron maiden are the masters of death. These are those moments where you think life is worth being given away. Nothing could be bigger or better than this, Insane bliss served in a plate in front of your own eyes. Although I have seen Maidens before, but trust me this one was Mightier and this time they were IRON MAIDEN to the core and they were in groove, and when Maidens are in groove they are merciless and ruthless. I am still in that mist around me, which is revolving round my head and everything seems repeating somewhere on a faded screen.

There are times when your patience has gone for a toss, your cool quotient goes into negativity and anxiety takes you over. I don't have tickets with me and I was waiting for my friend, who ought to have tickets(Thank you Raseel for the tickets and for the great company), my mind was making all forms of stories of mishaps happening around me and me missing the show. Today no hottie could have taken my attention away, I was just in the mood of being drowned in that flood of blood. I saw all forms of devotees wearing all forms of weirdest clothing(I would rather say they were hip and cool.) one can imagine, all possible rock band T-shirts and all Iron Maiden T-shirts manufactured till date.Unlike last time we didn't go inside to see that torture called as Lauren Harris and we even didn't go to see Parikrima, we just waited them to finish. I would say this has saved a loads of torture we suffered last year.

Bombay is not usually cold or something, but this time it was colder and wind was blowing, but inside with strong audience it didn't felt that much. Stage was dark and some veil was covering Maiden art, but it was mostly visible because of the that useless veil. Suddenly they played some song with initial drum thumping, people started shouting and all, thinking it was Maiden, but sooner everyone starting swearing for creating this false drama. Inception of gods is always wonderful and when you know they are here, you are awe-stuck. Two giant screen, both showing video of fighter planes from world war 2 and damn it, you this goddamn riff, Oh Mah Fuking God this is "ACES HIGH", Gods are here; As soon as lights are switched on you see Bruce running here and there madly, Crowd roar in joy, jumping, head banging , air guitaring, all devotees are offering their initial offerings to the deities. I can't believe my eyes all KNIGHTS of metal there standing right in front of my eyes, second time; my joy has multiplied more times than i can count. Before you can think anything, here comes another killer "2 minutes to midnight", Oh my god, entire band is standing lined up and playing it in killer fashion, flawlessly. After the song Bruce starts talking, you love him when he talks, what a frontman!!! His first sentence is "How are you Mumbai?" and audience screams madly. Then he takes out his cap and while rubbing his hairs he says something to which audience laughs hard. Bruce Dickinson is known for his fantastic English sense of humor in which he mixes audience pretty well. This time Bruce was wearing some short jacket over some shirt or something and wearing a trouser with many patched pieces of cloth like leaves on a tree; this reminds me of one of the greatest maiden concert live after death, in fact "Somewhere back in time" was no lesser. The next song which they played was "Revelation", Oh my fucking lord please have mercy on my soul, I could not recognize this one and felt like killing my self for this grave sin. In fact not much were able to recognize it either, I began to understand that this time Maidens are on killing spree and playlist is going to be insane. In between the song Bruce raised his hands to indicate something, I don't know what am i suppose to do, I have never seen this song live before. not just me but entire crowd was lost, none of them were familiar with this one. Next song was Tropper and Bruce was running maddly with Union Jack, waving it all across and singing on the raised thin platform on the stage. He did one insane thing this time, he threw union jack across the stage and it stuck as if were suppose to be held there. One funny incident happened that the flag got stuck somewhere and it got torn, but Bruce is smart enough, he managed it pretty well. Now here came his Signature cry " SCREAM FOR ME MUMBAI" , with all my might and force I screamed madly and so did everyone. Then he started making some English jokes and crowd looked here and there, since they seemed least familiar with english humor.
Next came "run to the hills" and "number of beast" in a row my heart sank with joy. In between you can see Janick Gers moving guitar around his body insanely, Oh man what a site. Next Bruce came with a large mask, he looked like some prehistoric nordic creature, he sung Powerslave entirely with that mask on. Now he started talking about this tour and his love with India and a city called as Bombay, which he read in some book. Finally he said that next song is about a bird and is an old song and then he gave many hints, I knew that rime of ancient mariner is coming, Bruce came with bird like attire, I always wished to see this song live and this was like living in an intoxicated dream. Since it is a very long song and in-between this song literally stops and then some small leads and riffs plays for few seconds, crowd thought the song is finished, I thought "what the fuck!!!! what a fucking bunch of posers are here", they did not know this song??? anyway the song picked again and this time Andrain smith played some face melting solo. Next came Moonchild, the beginning of this song is awesome with Dave Murray opening song with acoustic guitar, "Seven deadly sins Seven ways to win Seven holy paths to hell And your trip begins Seven downward slopes Seven bloodied hopes Seven a re your burning fires Seven your desires". Bruce finished this song with his killer high note scream hitting fourth octave. Now he talks about wasted time and all and made a clear inception of Wasted Years. Next came this song which leaves people perplexed "Iron maiden cant be faught, Iron maiden cant be sought. Oh well, wherever, wherever you are, Iron maidens gonna get you, no matter how far. See the blood flow watching it shed up above my head. Iron maiden wants you for dead. " How fucking true, I wanted to offer my heart taken out with my own hands for such a great song, Thank you Maidens. This song is simple song but with Powerful operatic Vocals of Bruce Dickinson, song reaches its peak. They said we are leaving and you want us next year, I thought this is time for an encore, but sad enough Bombay fans were fucking lame, they don't know how to greet the Holy Maiden, bloody filthy wannabes, knows nothing about metal concerts and Eddfest rituals. And some one from crowd shouted "want my money back", I thought how dare you "fucking dirty slimy motherfucking son of a stinking whore" dishonor the GREATEST HEAVY METAL Act on the planet. I just wanted to chop of his balls and mince them and mix with blood from his dick and feed it to dirty swines.
Anyway, Maiden came back and this time they had come to give an ultra fatal dose of what is going to pop your eyes out. They started with Clairvoyant, Raseel went mad at this song, he almost felt like crying, man what a riff, Steve Harris was using his Bass guitar as Machine gun killing everyone in crowd, I stretched my hands and bow before him. Eddie came in between doing some tricks with Andrian Smith, wow!!! a 10 feet tall live Eddie. Then came this sublime and clean stick work of Nicko McBrain, Jesus christ!!! this is it!!! "The fear of the dark", the hand goes automatically in the air "ho ho ho ho" and then that killer lead you just start jumping and head banging. Bruce pushed it little higher with that typical Devilish laughter, I was mad in frenzy, what a vocalist. Next number was still a madder one, "Can I play with madness" , Oh God, I am still playing with it. Then Bruce started introduction asking some one from crowd his name, then he said every one can't be introduced, so he said all of you are maiden fans, and he introduced all band members one by one and finally himself. Then came the moment everyone waits for when Maidens are playing, "Hallowed be thy Name". Dave Murray played killer lead with his cute smile and effortless finger motion on his guitar. My neck was aching with whiplash, my throat was hoarse, my feets were killing me, but I sang and banged my head, both my hands raised in honor of gods. I sang and banged throughout the song as if it will never happen again. The concert came to end with band members throwing drum pads to audience and Adrian Smith doing acrobatics with his guitar madly. Oh Holy Goodness!!! what a concert ! I am in eternal bliss, I want to cry my heart out, I want to kneel on my knees and thank the beast for all its brutality. As my feet started moving towards the gate, I feel a heaviness, I am undergoing a trauma, a pain and a pleasure of memories, I am heavily under Post Gig Depression, I have no cure for this one. I am just waiting to some more heavy shit in near future to get out of this depression.

what if........

What if I had known my life before
What if I was born 30 years before
What if I had everything i wanted
What if all my wishes were granted
What if I was an European
What if there was no competition
What if this place was less crowded
What if no one was guarded
What if we never emerged out of civilization
and archeology was just a mean of recreation
What if earth was flat and I keep walking till i fall from one end...
What if Rock Music comes out from a mollusc shell and sand...
What if sea was not deep and I knew how to swim it across
What if space was not empty and life would have been filled with water and not thoughts.
What if entropy was not governing universe and chaos was a friend of humans
What if Metallica played live at konark and there was millions of just me banging my head.
What if i could create cyborgs from lazer coming out my fingers.
What if alcohol was formed by oxidation of ginger with sulfur.
What if I could have changed things, without no one knowing.
What if there was a crop of bull dogs in a dirty swamp and no one was sowing.
What if all idiosyncrasies melt and take a form of pop-corns just busting out from opium poppy.
What if there is no judgement and all magistrates performs ballet in lockups.
What if all strips of calvin and hobbes were in forms of shloks from mahabharat.
What if I could create acids with hundreds of carboxylic groups with a single wave of my hand.
What if I can do ssh from one place to another, my very own transport.
What if closed source was open and patents were taken on things like burps and farts.
What if Allen made saas-bahu series and broadcasted them on pogo and all polar bears use them as a means of dancing in snow.

What if no one had known this art of writing..........

To MANAPA....

what is Manapa?
Well That is Muncipal Corporation of Pune, Is sapota gone into all those social hue and cry topics blaming authorities for all bads that had occurred?
Naah not at all, That's lame! This place has better things to talk about.
6 o'clock, 7 o'clock or may be 10:30 whatever time, exiting office is kind of comfort one always enjoys. Train of thought just starts its way, as if this is first station and a long journey is about to begin. Lift or stairs: why would sapota ascend down spending some calories? Sapota prefers salute over other ways of greeting, so he salutes hard to security person. Manapa may be around a Kilometer or may be 700 meters but no less than 500 meters.
Life is so colorful and humans are so full of doubts, it reflects so heavily even when one is walking down a road, which is just another repeatative activity. Showrooms are passing by, some of them are quite a mystery since never been there, sapota wonders what may be inside, but then you know showrooms are typically similar, and all these sale season thing is so much around these days that sometimes its enticing, at others it looks like huge chunk of accumulated trash.
This JM road is full of restaurants, some of them are nice, others shitty, there is one which is like open hall and chairs and table, that's it and hordes of people standing outside, sapota wonders what is so great about this place? It feels like as if eating on road. Who cares? people just want their share.
Now this is a secret Sapota is sharing. Crossing road is quite an exercise, one have to cross 5 roads, all of them runs as if electricity is flowing through wires. Sapota always try to find out most optimum path and fastest way of crossing the road. Till date sapota has found three mostly taken ways to do the same. Sometimes sapota is bored of taking this optimum path, so sapota just takes any path to cross these roads, pretty lame! right, but crossing road is a shitty experience, so trying to spice it up(huh.... seriously why would somebody extract pleasure out of something as useless as crossing road.)
Anyway now sapota is nearer to destination and he is walking fast and people are wondering "Is this guy supercharged or what or Is his ass on fire?", but sapota never even bother to give a damn and walks and walks like a soldier, just marching.
Manapa is utterly chaotic, Buses, autos, bikes, scooters, bicycle, all in same small place. Getting in bus is a hard exercise and trust me, if line is coming out of the bus stand, then better get ready for breath-stopping journey, couple of times if you are lucky you may get a shared auto, but then sitting in that rickshaw is heck of a pain in butt. Sapota is not frustrated or annoyed or for that matter complaining about all these discomforts, but darling this is typical scene, anywhere in this part of world, have to live with it and have to love it.

Zero Eight @ Goa

Sapota knows pretty well that writing a blog on GOA will be pretty a cliched piece of writing, So........ be brief! This was a meeting of most exceptional bakarchods of all times, 7 of them riping apart each other is fun of life. Everything seems to be part of life when you are with loved ones, Even with imperfection in our attainments; frustrations, anxiety and anger has surrounded us, but when mustandas are together pure fun overwhelms everything.
Well explored everything we wished to, sworn at everything and everyone, repeated n number of session of bakchodee and alcohol, stared and fielded with all possible forms of hotties available. Being at new year eve in GOA was a mission and trust me we did it pretty well(Sorry Naresh, I know you are cursing me). A picture is worth thousand words (OMG! one more cliched phrase! but life is so bloody cliched, donno how to avoid that?), so here are the link for the pictures of GOA, they will explain entire story:
http://picasaweb.google.com/chambilkethakur/TheGOA

Mustandas rox!!!

Well yes they do? do u disagree? if yes, then please fuck off. there are no exceptions to that. Some of sapotas friend will be disappointed with the fact that this blog is not about defining mustandas, well everyone knows that; U don't ?????, u looser! This blog is going to discuss sapota's visit to veer tha dhaba.
Well sapota has been to veer tha dhaba twice, once at real one and this time at the mini one. Veer the dhaba is not actually a dhaba by any means, it means that dhabas are completely something else, its unlike any dhaba. okay it is on a highway, owner is a punjabi, but then environment is totally different. This is a place where you see hundreds of dudes(literally!). They have come here to hang out with other dudes and have fun without much of hassles. You can see group of mustandas drunk and shouting and dancing and singing and huging and kissing(that's pretty embarrassing, but its okay, you do kiss ur brother, right!) each other.
They play loud music and most of this is kinda music sapota unlikes, but pretty apt for such venue. So here sapota was discussing some shit with his fellas and some guys were dancing and giving buday bump to one of them on some raised platform meant to dance. Songs were playing and then played this 90s song from some Pakistani singer "hawa hawa khusboo luta de" Oh My fawkin Gawd!!! that was like unleashing some monster, people went mad,every one was dancing and singing, even sapota was feeling euphoric. Every mustanda(hindi speaking... common ones), if he calls himself a mustanda, then he must have at one point of time in his life have loved this song, this songs is like one of the greatest romantic song which mustandas want to sing with his friends fantasizing a date with some chic. This venue is open under the dark black sky(we were there at night, offcourse!!!) near a highway and a hilly backdrop, all mustandas love getting drunk in such environment. Mustandas were doing all sorts of weird things, that possibly no one will even try in sane mind, but they were happy like a babies. Well Sapotas friends were loving this moment and yes, thanking each other for beautiful evening. Life seem so bright and simple out there.

Metal: a Headbanger's journey

Few days back sapota has seen this documentary titled as this blog. Sapota had heard about this one for quite some time, but couldn't spare enough attention for it. However, fortune favors the brave(haa haa ;) ). This fella called Sam Dunn is a Metalhead like Sapota and has shown many things and few of them were quite new. He made this documentary to let main stream people understand why typically metalheads are "what they are?". He has done quite an awesome work in covering things, particularly step by step analysis of entire heavy metal phenomenon from its origin to metal culture. Spota loved everything about this documentary.
Sapota would like to highlight few things which sapota find interesting. The documentary was talking about origin, although disputed, but everyone knows Sabbaths are the fathers of Heavy Metal. They interviewed Iommi and Rush vocalist to get an insight, which was too cool. But then they interview Alice cooper, who is quite a character, Sapota always took him for soft rock, but he is one of the originators of shock rock. Cooper made news for being wicked and bizarre, many countries banned him. This fella is Big mouth, he said he originated Metal!
Then one more interesting personality to be interviewed was Dee Schneider of Twisted sister, this fella has written songs on teacher-student and parent-student clashes from subject's point of view. He was questioned by congress committee for his explosive lyric contents, and he is such a dude that he blew them apart.
They interviewed Capt Dickinson also, who is always as welcoming as anyone can be, Sam Dunn is one true devotee of Iron Maidens. Documentary analysed female participation in Heavy metal, Sapota would like to say this section seems more like trying to be politically correct kinda or may be this guy is trying to be as impartial as possible. However not much females are seen in real Heavy Metal, only few in alternative metal, and quite few in newer gothic or nu-metal bands. Sapota is not trying to be racist of Chauvnist, but Sapota has not seen any female in metal worth appreciating.
Now most interesting part was Black Metal. Venoman early band with early sounds of metal, quite dark and controversial. Venom made an album called Black Metal, which can be attributed to be inspiration for this genre. Now the journey took us to small Norwegian town near OSLO. This place has an old Church, quite important to Scandinavians, which was burnt by some black metal vocalist,who was sentenced for long. Anyway this town is home of Black metal, so many black metal fellas were interviewed. Here the race is to become most brutal band and do thing never done, anyway black metal derives its lyric contents from norse mythology and has quite an element of melodic metal.
Documentary inspected violence and outrageousness of Metal fans and bands alike, but no definitive conclusion, since bands are just trying to express wildest of their imagination. They interviewed Slayer vocalist Tom Araya, who says "offcourse God does not hates us all, but then its a cool album title", Sapota full heartedly agree, period.
They mentioned almost everyone but mentioned Metallica just once, saying the biggest metal band. Sapota would have loved an interview with Jaymz and Marilyn Manson or Mustaine, but no place for them :(.
Concludingly offcourse this guy went to huge concert at Wacken Germany, the documentary ended with Metallica song.

Lazy turtles of Hajo

Journey PART IX

Ha ha, that's probably a bad way of writing a title, but at this time, nothing better is coming to mind.
So after traveling to outskirts of Guwhati for more then 50 minutes, we arrived at this place called Hajo. Well contrary to popular belief Assam is predominantly a hindu state and most population is religious. Sapota must admit that he has developed a strong dislike for hindu pilgrims mostly because of Pundas and kind of environment there.
So here at Hajo there is a so-called lake,which is more like a dirty pond and it is believed that feeding fishes at pond is considered sacred. So we bought some biscuit and start throwing biscuits in pond, in no time there was many fishes and turtles at the spot. Most of these turtles and fishes have grown fat and goddamn lazy, they just want everything to be thrown in their mouths
We went to this ancient shiv temple with a plate full of some articles like garlands and "Prasad", Priest assumed we were there for rituals, so they started troubling us. But Sapota is a hard nut and has advanced training in dealing with these things, so sapota did not succumb and used his Bakarchodee skills to persuade pandas that he knows much more than those guys.

Anyway this temple was quite old temple, a very typical one situated at height and stepway to reach it, with beggars sitting along steps. This temple has strange sculpts of British soldiers guarding temple, which made sapota think about their relevance?

Anyway, next we see couple of temples, which they say are mostly from era of Pandavs.
There was this temple called KedarNath, yes! really they call this with same name.
Next we saw this HUGE "something" called Bhimthaal(Bheem's Plate literally) , they say Bheem used to eat in this thing!!!

Assam is quite a humid place, so after this visit we moved quickly back to Gautam's place, which brought Sapota's journey of North East to an end. Still many place in Assam, Arunachal, Sikkim and Nagaland were left unvisited.

It Rains really hard here !

Journey PART VIII
From Shillong to Cherrapunji is much better drive, primarily because of good condition of roads and secondly because you are moving more towards rainiest place on the face of this planet. Our first stoppage was this view point near DUWAN SING SYIEM BRIDGE, (can't figure out how to say it!!!). Standing on this viewpoint gives you a magnificent view of an entire valley full of green beautiful trees, wild flowers, streams, clouds and this bridge, seems like this-is-not-real.


Well, we moved on.. this next place we visited was most beautiful place of this entire journey and made a profound impression on sapota's memory, which will last for ever. We were little unfortunate when we went to Nohkalikai falls, entire fall was invisible due to clouds, these clouds were so dense that you cannot see anything beyond 3-4 meters.

We tried hard to get a glimpse, for that we descended deep into jungles, but all we could get was sound of water head, but no sight of waterfall. This entire place was located on highest place in cherrapunji, so clouds were floating around and we were literally walking in clouds.


After moving around this place for some time, we moved towards Mawsmai Caves, these caves are natural caves, made by flow of rain water. Caves are dark and there is now way sunlight can enter, most important thing to notice in these caves are water made sculpts(or structures.), seems like been sculpted by man. But the kind of sculpting, that is, seems infeasible for humans. These caves have very very slippery and difficult surface, so walking across them was not easy.


In Cherrapunji there is this spot called seven sister falls, an attraction special to entire North east. We went to this viewpoint, but it was a hot day and it didn't rained for quite long, so these falls were thin. Moving back we visited this eco-park, which had man made structures and natural beauty combined together. And surprisingly(for us) all those falls were located here and now we had a clearer view of entire thing. The valley below was very deep, sapota tried to capture the valley along with fall, but not to much success. There was one more interesting thing that was a lost waterfall, which was suppose to come out somewhere from the mountain edge, but it was falling much before it and water was seeping to ground(actually the mountain!), again we tried very very hard to capture the thing, but could not.

This place was very near to Bangladesh border, which was somewhere towards some far end.
Well this part of journey was over with our arrival back in Shillong. Sapota will write more about Hajo visit in next blog.

A day in Shillong

Journey PART VII
It was rather two days in Shillong, we discovered some part the night we reached and other half next day. Well as soon as you enter Shillong, you will notice considerable temperature fall. We were staying at Center Point Hotel(courtesy Dutta), which was situated at center of main market in Shillong. We after checking in and all, moved out to have a walk across the city.
Shillong has a typical environment of a hill station; most of the roads are sloppy and one-way; if you are not sure where you have to go, you will be lost for sure. Shillong is one of the cities established by Britishers, so like all British-made-cities, its typically beautiful, neat and more organized. It is called as Fashion Capital of North East and one of the most prominent cities having rock culture. No wonder you can see dudes and chics clad in something unusual for other parts of India. So while roaming around Sapota was easily able to locate kool rock merchandise: Tees, Belts, posters, Music CDs, chains and many such things. It seemed like sapota was not at all in India. Next, Sapota went to a Thai Restaurant, Sapota had no clue what persuaded him to try this thing, but it was nice, having exquisite cuisines is always delightful.

Next day we went to this Lake called as ward lake. This lake is a beautiful man made lake, I believe(although not sure) it must have been made by Brits. We hired a boat and sailed across the entire lake. there was a small lotus pond separated by a fence in the lake itself, lake was surrounded by pinus trees and since it was early morning, so people were feeding fishes in lake from the foot bridge. Near this Lake was a Botanical Garden and it has a huge tree, which has huge roots, on which sapota hanged for a huge amount of time and posed for many snaps(Quite a bloody poser you know).

Then next we went to see the Cathedral of Mary help of Christians, we had a tough time locating this church since we had no clue about the way. Finally we could locate the church, thanks to the CAB fella who took us there. The church was Grand, it was quiet and it was quiet, The home of god must be peaceful and it must be easily accessible. The church was beautiful, neat had huge seating capacity and it reflected some old construction, Sapota had no clue about architectures. Sopata was thinking in contrast to his visit to temples, where he was bugged by Pundas, who are exploiting the religion, no doubt people are afraid to go to temples. Well this part of city was full of catholic churches and schools. Shillong has a good amount of high profile Christian schools, famous all across the country.

Next Place we visited was Elephant falls, these falls were although not big, but properly maintained and worth visiting, this one is also an English discovery. Sapota can safely say Brits are much more lovers of marvels of nature than anyone else. While traveling to this place, we passed through Shillong Cantt. So when u see trees painted in white and red, that's signal: "this is military area". Shillong Cantt. is one of the most beautiful Cantts, pinus tree all throughout the sides of road, all of them shaped up so orderly and neat, I felt like staying there for the entire day.
But we cannot afford this, so we moved on, next stop we headed towards was "Shillong Peak or View Point(that's common name here, there are many other in nearby areas)" . This area was typically inside Air force station of shillong and no wonders it has strict timings. So we went to see this place. Well this is one of those places were we can view entire shillong in one glance. My perception that shillong was small, went for toss here, Shillong is quite big, not comparable to cities on plains, but yes for a city entirely on a hill, it is big. Sapota realizes the importance of this place here, as here u get a perfect idea of how beautiful this city is.

Entering the home of Clouds

Journey Part VI
This is one of the finest journeys of Sapota's life, crossing Assam and getting into the Meghalaya. We were traveling with Gautams car(he calls it dhanno!) so we can just stop anywhere and click whatever we want. Meghalaya is totally different from Assam in most of the things, one can say its a totally hilly state, unlike Assam which is more like plains or may be a plateau. Entire path i.e. guwhati shillong highway is very pleasant (minus potholes, sorry roads were really bad here.). The flora here is totally different from Assam, assam primarily has thick big trees and mostly bamboos, but in meghalaya its more of pinus and other such plants.

Since its hilly throughout there, so roads were spiral and towards shillong it was all uphill, Gautam was having tough time Driving. Anywhere just besides the roads you can see step farms or some times a small lake or pond and water-falls popping out somewhere from rock.


The first sign that we have reached Meghalaya came to us when we saw first clouds just over our heads among the pinus trees.Sapota was ecstatic, he said "WoW clouds !!!". From now on we can see clouds just anywhere and everywhere, it appeared as if sun is trying its level best to peep from clouds, but he had little chance, we knew now for sure that we are in Megh-alaya. Meghalaya's native are khasi people, female wears a typical khasi attire, which is something like a skirt and a top and one large single cloth going from front to bottom spirally around the body, they speak khasi, which is not a language and they use roman alphabets to write it, so its almost impossible to pronounce anything, which is written, at first go u will feel its english, but sorry dude, you are tricked! its khasi written in roman script. By evening we finally reached Shillong.

Rendezvous with Mighty Brahmputra

Journey PART V
Sapota is always in awe of water bodies for many reason, one of them is sapota can't swim; the other is the kind of might, force and depth water bodies have, that inspires sapota to become an artist and keep appreciating the marvels of nature. Brahmaputra is one those few river, which awe-inspires sapota. One may feel that Sapota is some kind of freak obsessed with a bloody river, Well, that is not the case, sapota just loves nature and its beauty.
Guwhati is one of those big cities who are situated on the bank of mighty rivers. It is believed that all major civilizations have started on the banks of mighty rivers. So here we went to see this larger-than-life river and as expected, it was huge. It was much much bigger than any river sapota have ever seen in his life; Ganges seemed like a stream as compared to brahmaputra, and to add to this let me tell u that Brahmputra is only 1/3rd its actual size in Guwhati, To actually see how big Brahmputra is, one has to go to Tezpur.


Somewhere in upper Assam, Brahmaputra has an island called as Majuli island. Majuli is world's largest island in a river!!!
Well Sapota wanted to sit besides the river for long time and keep watching its beauty, but unfortunate enough, Guwhati don't have that kind of bank, where u can actually sit and watch. The water appears muddy, but still look pleasant and much cleaner than rivers in other part of country, at Tezpur the water is clear and transparent, which is real color of the river. Brahmputra is also know as sorrow of Assam. The volume of water in river is magnanimous and it rains too heavily in North-east, so during entire monsoon, river keeps this place in state of flood. Sapota wished if he knew swimming, but to his dismay, he was told its very very dangerous to swim in this river, although, otherwise very silent, but brahmputra has very sharp underwater currents, which are sufficiently powerful to sink a boat.
Some small islands with thick range of trees were adding to the beauty of this place. Entire experience was exhilarating, inspite of humid heat of Assam, bank of river were cool and pleasant. God has blessed Assam with rich flora and fauna and this river adds ornamental beauty to this green state.

hot water and tea gardens

Journey PART IV
Garam Pani(literally Hot water) seems like one of the crudest naming conventions adopted, but in Asom it was pretty know place. So during this visit Sapota visited Golaghat, where he had some nice Assamese experiences. The first one worth mentioning is the hotel Nambor(sound like "number" being screwed badly), where we stayed appeared like some kind of resort.


So when in golaghat Sapota took a trip to garampani. Garampani is nothing, but natural hot water spring in the midst of a jungle. Well place was really hot and since Assam is humid, sapota had a tough time. Garam Pani is situated at border of KarbiOngLong and Golaghat. The jungle in this area is real dense and scary and to add to this, sapota discovered that this place has ULFA's Head quarter nearby. But sapota still went inside the place(off course not too deep) and clicked some snaps. The Flora and fauna of this place actually very rich, but due to all this tension, the place looks totally deserted.



Next day sapota went to see Numaligarh, this place has one of the biggest oil refineries in Area called as NRL. The other beautiful thing about this place is Tea Gardens. Tea gardens are one of the most beautiful creation of nature groomed by man. Tea Garden on the slope of a hill appears like a thick green matters, pure eye candy.

By the end of the day, sapota went to see some temple, forget the name(poor memory, u see) which has trees of some biological importance. These trees are declared as heritage fauna for the reason that they stand for a very long time and they are home of large honeybees. The Hives on these are huge, which means much much larger than any honey-beehive, one has ever seen. But sapota was unlucky, there were no hive due to rains.


At evening(okay actually night, its nite here at 5:30), Sapota was looking at dark highway and wondering if some bunch of elephant come out, but as usual nothing happened. Saopta kept looking at this board on highway and thinking about..... on a lonesome highway east of.....

I was in Nagaland

Journey PART III
Well Nagaland is not an easy state for an outsider like sapota. But sill Sapota traveled to the territory as tourist, totally ignorant of the Dangers like NSCN. The most pleasant part of journey was sitting near window and watching lush green Assam passing by. Sapota was practicing the art of motion photography in the train.As the say deep jungle of Assam, trust me every word is true, they are so bloody dense that seeing beyond second lines of tree is very difficult and they say sometimes elephants can be seen on roads, but sapota was not fortunate enough.

But scenic greenery, Meadows, water bodies, jungles and paddy fields were treat to eyes. Sapota was feeling a different kind of happiness altogether. When Sapota reached Dimapur, the entrance to the Nagaland and the only place in Nagaland sapota visited, he came across things contrary to his beliefs. Nagas are not that hospitable people and one may get caught in trouble, so its better to stay inside. But Sapota cannot stay inside for long, so finally Mr The Cha Moo took him finally to the so-called hongkong market. The market was usual roadside congested market, but the kind of goods it was selling was different. Replicas of branded apparels and fashion accessories, leather goods and woolen goods were available for much lesser price, and if you can bargain it well, then this is the place for you. The real fun of being a tourist is shopping, trying exotic stuff, bargaining with absurd prices and finally buying thing which will hardly be used. So sapota played this part well enough, enjoying every moment.


Okay one thing is left out, the legend regarding the Dimapur is that it is named after the Hid-gimba, the daemon wife of Bheem, they say there is a huge chessboard, where pandavs used to play. Unfortunately Sapota could not travel to place due to time and security constraints, but fun in fear was a different experience all together.

The royal Bengali Phaak

Journey PART II
Well not all experiences are pleasant even if u are traveling for fun. But this was different and in sapota's terms it was burning my money(read khoon-pasine kee kamai) and get fucked royally.
On this Netaji Basu airport, there is not a single pre-paid and sapota is wondering, "what to do", in the meanwhile his friend calls up and ask him to get to some place called Gariahaat. By the time sapota left pune he had news that Calcutta has pleasant weather(that means not raining, there is nothing called pleasant weather in Calcutta), but two days in Bombay has left him isolated from the world. So here sapota came to know its raining cats and dogs in Cal for last 2 days non-stop. So this part of world(read dumdum airport) is totally disconnected from other part of civilization.
Sapota used his Bakar skills with some security fella to get him out. Consequently sapota was taken to a shady hotel, which looks like Vyom kesh Bakshi(It was a detective serial on DD) type of lodge, sapota felt a chill of fear. Since it was raining Taxis were making hay, sapota was charged heavily for distance less 5 km. Sapota shut all his doors hard to avoid all forms of mishaps, and wake up directly in morning.
Thankfully there was no more rain in morning, so Sapota thought of using metro to get to the destination, so he boarded local bus. Bloody crowded and humidity made sapota suffocate along with hardcore difficult bengali all around making him look like retard. After 40 minutes of struggle bus finally stopped, but the light at the end of the tunnel is always another train coming your way; there u were at a place full of flood water, a bus or may be a truck was badly stuck in water below the bridge with water upto wind shields of the vehicle. Sapota was shocked he said in utter frustrations "this is what i called 'fuck de royale' ". Sapota returned back to same place where he started with the same bus cursing all the devils in hell.
Finally sapota somehow managed to get a taxi to take him to desired place, but this one burnt a big hole in Sapota's pocket. Sapota again managed to get another hotel burning another big amount of money for absolutely no good reason.
The tragedy did not stop here; Sapota was staying at supposedly posh area, so sapota circumscribed entire area of 500 meters to find out a nice breakfast joint, but to his dimay he could just find sweet shops and pooris, sapota was wondering ,"why the hell do these bengalis don't have breakfast". This was still 9 in morning and sapota was perspiring so heavily his entire clothes were wet, this kind of humidity is special to this place.
In afternoon sapota went to famous Kali Temple of calcutta, which turn out to be still bigger fiasco. The very reason hindus shun going to pilgrim is Pandas troubling devotees. This is so ridiculous, who are these people between devotee and deities. Anyway Sapota is a hard nut, so he managed to get out with out getting much in trouble, but he could not actually wait and see the place.
Floods and then heat made this experience of calcutta puzled sapota as to why did he wasted so much time and money at this place.

The maiden flight

Journey PART I
Sapota was traveling by Bombay local and listening this conversation between some teenagers about airplanes. This one was bragging about how he has flown to various places and what all airlines. Sapota started imagining himself as a kid and how he wondered about his flying. Sapota always wondered as a kid that flying was for riches and he was unsure whether he will ever make it.
Bombay Airport is really one heck of a place. It was nice and upto the standard as what sapota imagined an air port should be, neat and pleasant. Sapota went to check-in counter and there was this make-up clad lady, which gave him a fake smile. Sapota hates all this fake smile thing, but he anyway returned back a fake smile.
Every where sapota saw many phony beauties and bunch of pretentious people around. After spending a grand amount on infinitesimal quantity of food, sapota boarded the plane. As sapota went inside he can see some form of fog all around, that was new! Sapota thought that was for the effect, but no it was just the air conditioning thing. Now the next thing Sapota saw was Ms Ekta Vohra, man! she was hawt and trust me she was genuine beauty, the punjabi one.
Anyway sapota has chosen the seat just next to wings just to see them, it was his earnest desire to see the so-called aero-foil. Take off was fast and one can really feel the force, huge amount of thrust and there we are, flying. Now due to clouds one can really see flow lines near the aerofoil, Sapota was thanking Bernoulli, Reynolds and Newton for what they have done for the mankind. Sapota during most of his flight was staring Ms Ekta and listening to some heavy shit.
Plane stopped at Nagpur for sometimes and all sapota can hear was flight attendant asking not to take snaps of this place due to military restrictions.
In between captain was giving updates on final of twenty-20, some jerk shouted "chak-de" in plane. Sapota felt, "What the phaak!". Finally reached Calcutta airport aka Netaji Subhash Chardra Bose(Basu in Bengali), which was utterly disappointing. not to say of what followed next.....

what a waste !!!

Life sometimes makes one to do things, which one do not wish to do. What sapota is trying to say is that since he has set some standards for himself and going below them is utterly tourturing. Sapota do not say or justify any of his statement on the ground of good or bad, but then he is always more inclined on his likes and dislike and sometimes strongly. Sapota went to see hindi movies for 15 times and found all of them unsatisfactory and disappointing, and after each movie he took a vow of no more repeating the performance but literally every time much to his own dismay and with heavy heart, he sacrificed his vows for dear ones. There is a limit to the number sacrifice sapota can make, but not beyond it. And this time after 15th repeated follies, sapota has determined "NO" and "NO". Sapota with strong will and determination persisted trough the vow for more then 4 months, but grass didn't remained green for long and sapota, inspite of his hard will and single mindedness, became prey of circumstances.
A usually bad day started with zero result effort and now here we are standing to make choice of which of these movies will least torturing, sapota had a sudden fear of undergoing a pain for next 3 hours. Sapota is standing at ticket counter, looking right into eyes of the ticket distributer, she has received him with dull looks, sapota with his hands trembling with fear, flashes his card, "6 tickets for this show". Sapota in the back of his mind is still thinking, "why the heck am i suppose to do this". May be, it not always your happiness that counts, but this is their happiness, which makes u happy.
Inside the hall, we are always happy until movie starts with our wise cracks and our goofy slapstick remarks. Bunch of chicks in hind row and some rowdy lads in front. Now as everyone was expecting movie will be crappy and to make things interesting everyone expected sapota to pass real funny remarks, but for some reason sapota's creativity and enthusiasm was yawing somewhere else. Anyway chicks at hind row were enjoying and passing some silly comments, which can barely make you laugh, but still chicks were enjoying, and sapota and his allies were making all efforts to get a glance of chicks by some or other way(this includes frequent visits to loo).
Movie has all forms of predictable jokes, below standard jokes and no humor whatsoever, some of the jokes were pathetic, some of them gross and most of them untimely and really bad. Only one person was worth watching, Javed jafri(sapota is his big fan, for his awesome comic sense). Arshad warshi was biggest disappointment. Sapota, until the end was figuring out as to what was he doing in movie. Anyway movie was a total fiasco, total waste of sapotas currency and more than that sapota's time, Sapota could have seen two nice movies in the time, but then man proposes and god disposes. So once more sopta has succumb to something really creepy and total waste.